Mindsiege Read online

  Jonas’s smile faded. “There are reasons not to heal Sandra, but the reasons to fix her far outweigh the risks.”

  “And those are?”

  “There are two. One, I’d train you to block me and the others who are capable of controlling your mind and actions. Consider it my thank-you.”

  I was still hoping Jack, Kyle, and I could figure that out together. That was part of the reason Jack had forced me to run back to Wellington.

  “And two,” Jonas continued. “Sandra made sure the clones she created suffered consequences when using their special abilities. This was to prevent any one of us from going all rogue on her.”

  “That sounds more like a reason to let her rot.”

  “She knows how to cure your bloody noses, and your unconsciousness after you heal matters of the brain. She can remove Jack’s extreme nausea after he treats injuries.”

  “And she can get rid of your panic attacks?” I asked, assuming that his panic attacks had everything to do with controlling me. Served him right.

  “And Kyle’s blindness.”

  Kyle longed to use his ability without experiencing temporary blindness, and I hated that Jack felt sick every time he healed someone. It would be near impossible to learn the extent of our abilities if we fell ill anytime we used our minds the way they were designed to be used.

  The simple answer would be to tell Jonas no. I still wasn’t convinced I would ever use these unnatural abilities—however, what my friends chose wasn’t up to me. What if their destiny in life was to help others as only they could? I didn’t want them to suffer if there was a way for me to help them. Who was I to think I had all the answers for everybody else?

  Furthermore, I had a strong desire to learn how our minds were wired. I needed to block out Jonas—and anyone else with this mindsieging ability.

  “Okay, so what’s my first lesson?”

  “So, you agree? You’ll heal Sandra’s brain?” His voice showed a hint of excitement.

  “I didn’t say that. I want to know what you’re offering.” I was willing to do just about anything to regain control of my mind from Jonas.

  He cocked his head. The corners of his lips lifted. “You don’t get it, do you?” He uncrossed his legs and slid off the bed.

  “Get what? That you want me to do something that might very well kill me?”

  He walked close enough to me that I could reach out and touch him. I was tempted to do just that. Would I be able to feel him if I did? Wasn’t this just a dream?

  He took another step, then reached out and grabbed my wrist. His fingers wrapped around one by one, gripping my wrist with pressure that told me he was very much right there in front of me. With a quick jolt, he spun me so that I was facing away from him and staring at Sandra. “I will not let you die,” he whispered close to my ear. “But you will heal Sandra. I brought you here to get you used to the idea. I will be with you when you do it, and I will help you. I will make sure you live through the process.”

  I sucked in a deep breath. “How is it possible that you can touch me if you’re not here?” How could I feel his warm breath on my cheek?

  “Lexi, I am so real in your mind, that not only can you feel my body and hear my voice…” He spoke softly close to my ear. His fingers brushed along my arm on their way up my body until his hand clutched my throat. “…you’d feel pain if I squeezed just so.”

  His fingers tightened around my neck, cutting off my air supply. I clawed at his hand and tried to pry his fingers away. I gagged and sputtered. I couldn’t breathe. “I’ll be in touch, Sarah Alexandra. Jack’s coming. Tell him he might want to stay away from you while you sleep.” He squeezed harder, then brushed a kiss along my jawline.

  “Lexi! Lexi, wake up!”

  Suddenly, Jonas’s hand was gone from my throat. I fell to my knees and sucked in a labored breath. My throat burned as I gasped for oxygen.

  “Hey.” Gentle hands touched my shoulders.

  I slowly raised my head. Jack’s frantic eyes searched mine. I threw myself into his arms. “Oh, Jack. I’m in huge trouble.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  I had avoided Jack since Tuesday, which he didn’t deserve, but he couldn’t help me get rid of Jonas—or whoever was controlling Jonas—and I couldn’t look at that helpless look on his face any longer. If I was being honest, he may have been avoiding me as well.

  The library was quiet. We’d been back for four days. I sat curled up in an armchair, facing a large window overlooking the multi-purpose field where the girls’ soccer team practiced in the rain. My laptop sat open. I had read the last words Dad wrote to me at least ten times in the last hour.

  I stared at the droplets of water trailing down the pane in front of me, every once in a while glancing toward the girls kicking a soccer ball around, knocking each other down on the turf. Normal, everyday activity for kids at a boarding school.

  “Wellington was supposed to be a safe haven for the clones we found over the years,” Dad had said in his letter to me. The list of clones hidden in his research showed me there were many others, but I had yet to figure out who knew about us, or whom I could trust with the information I was discovering now.

  I couldn’t help but hope the other clones, the ones on Dad’s list that hadn’t found their way to Wellington, had discovered a way to lead normal lives. Away from the poking and prodding of scientists. Away from people who were scared and wanted the clones destroyed.

  Subconsciously, my hand drifted up toward my neck. My fingers pressed lightly against my skin, feeling for any bruising from my altercation with Jonas. The skin hadn’t darkened, nor shown any signs of redness, but I could feel it. Jonas had scarred me.

  Now, three days later, I hadn’t heard a single whispered word from him. And I was thankful. Mostly. I was starting to realize that his motives didn’t line up—that he was telling me the truth when he claimed it wasn’t just him inside my head. One moment he was telling me to heal Sandra or he would hurt someone I loved. And the next? He was kissing me and assuring me that he wouldn’t let me die if I were to heal Sandra. The only thing that made sense was that someone, another clone, was behind the threats and the commands to heal Sandra.

  But who? And why? Who was Sandra to Jonas and this mystery control freak?

  “Hey, you,” Danielle said, interrupting my thoughts as she plopped into the chair diagonal from me. Her long blond hair was in a low, side ponytail, and draped halfway down her chest. Based on the yoga pants and fitted top, she had been to yoga class. “Why are you hiding in here?”

  I looked around. “Hiding? I’m sitting out in the open on the main floor of the library, Dani.”

  “It’s Friday afternoon. No one studies”—she lifted the corner of the book lying across my lap—“Advanced Biology on the weekend. You’re hiding from something. Or someone.” She raised a single brow.

  I wasn’t hiding from anything. I couldn’t hide from Jonas. Why bother? He’d find me.

  When I didn’t respond to her, she said, “Something happen between you and Jack?”

  I studied her brown eyes. “No. Why?”

  “I don’t know. You seem depressed or something. I’ve never seen you depressed. And since you’ve never been in love before Jack, I thought maybe he was the reason.” She reached out and gave my knee a playful knock. “If he did something, you know I can help. I know people.” Dani wiggled her eyebrows, giving me the signal that she’d have “her people” cut his legs off if I just said the word.

  Finally, I gave in and laughed out loud. “No, Jack didn’t do anything.” I shook my head, then focused back on my best friend and roommate for the past six years. My normal friend. “Dani, why did your parents send you to Wellington?”

  Dani seemed to shift in her seat at my question. “What do you mean?”

  “Well, you’ve been here almost as long as I have, but I don’t know much about your parents.” Other than that they never showed much involvement in her academic choices.
/>   “Wellington kids don’t know each others’ parents. That’s how it’s always been.” She looked down, wringing her hands in her lap. “Well, except for your father, I guess.”

  It was somewhat of an honor system at Wellington. We were never supposed to ask about Wellington students’ histories or their families. I’d known Dani’s parents were strict with her, but fairly absentee at the same time—like Dad in a lot of ways. Dani and I had spent many holidays and summers together at school. And when she did leave for holidays, she always traveled somewhere exotic, like Switzerland for skiing or Maui for scuba diving. Never home.

  The only thing I knew for sure about her parents was that her father loved thoroughbred horse racing. “So, is your father in for the Keeneland October race meet?”

  “Probably.” She chewed on a cuticle and scanned the room behind me. When her eyes found me again, she asked, “So, you going to study all night?”

  I narrowed my gaze when she changed the subject, but decided to back off the interrogation. Why was I giving her such a hard time anyway? She’d been my best friend forever and ever. “Uh… no,” I answered.

  “And nothing’s wrong with you and Jack?”

  “No.” I shook my head to reinforce the answer.

  “Good.” She stood and reached for my hand. “Then we’re going out.” She pulled me out of my chair.

  “Out?”

  “Yeah. Well, sort of. Not quite out out, but a double date.” Though her voice was upbeat, her shoulders slumped. “We were going to venture outside the confines of this place. Wellington lifted our security lockdown.”

  “They did?” I knew they had. That was the only reason I agreed to stay at Wellington. Though I wasn’t sure I should be leaving the safety of the electric fence and dorm security guards just yet. I still wasn’t sure who had tried to kill me. Still, it was nice knowing we could get out if we desired, yet tough for outsiders to get in. “But we’re not going now?”

  “No, apparently Jack squashed the idea.” She raised her hand and gnawed on a cuticle, then with a slight wave of her hand said, “Something about your safety and there being more to the truck that ran you off the road last week.”

  “Jack said that?” I picked up my Advanced Biology book and hugged it against my chest.

  Dani nodded. “You don’t think you’re still in danger, do you?”

  “No.” I tried to put truth behind my words. “I think we’re okay inside Wellington. Jack’s just being overprotective.” I smiled. “So… who might Jack and I be doubling with?”

  She looked down at her feet. I’d never seen her so shy about a boy in my life. “Kyle and me.”

  I pulled her into a hug. It wasn’t that I was excited about this matchup between Miss Normal and Mr. Freak-Like-Me, but she obviously felt something for Kyle. I would not be the one to erase the smile from my best friend’s face.

  Releasing her, I held her at arm’s length. “One problem. I have an early curfew tonight because of my meet tomorrow. I’m expected to qualify for state in three events.” I laughed. I had made practice only three times that week. Just enough to possibly win races, I hoped.

  “I’m told they’ve got curfew covered.”

  “Okay. Well, let me finish up here, and I’ll meet you back at the room.”

  “Perfect.” Dani sashayed out the door, leaving me alone again with my computer and my thoughts about Dad, Sandra, and the IIA.

  And Jonas.

  I brushed my fingers along my jawline where Jonas had brushed his lips. Even though it was a dream of some sort, it had seemed so real. But he wasn’t really there.

  What was real? I wondered.

  Jonas wanted Sandra cured, as did Georgia and Fred. The clones in the underground facility knew Sandra, and they recognized me as a younger version of her. IIA agents swarmed The Farm. Dad said in his letter to me that Sandra had always intended for the embryos to become humans, and that the IIA had funded her efforts. But Dad didn’t know the location of the IIA facility until days before he was murdered—according to Jonas.

  Was Jonas controlled by the IIA? And since Jonas controlled me—directly or indirectly—was I now being controlled by the same government agency?

  I would not be controlled by those evil nut jobs. “I am not a puppet,” I whispered to myself. I shoved my book into my backpack. Yes, a date was definitely in order. I needed normal.

  ~~~~~

  Seated on a blanket, I leaned against Jack, who was supported by a tree behind him. My back was to his chest, and his arms circled around me, holding me tight. “This was a great idea,” I said. I tilted my head up, giving Jack access to my lips, which he gladly took advantage of. We pretended all was well.

  Kyle and Jack had organized and pulled off the perfect date inside Wellington. A candlelit picnic in the woodsy area behind the stables was a brilliant idea. We had privacy, ambience, and all the awkwardness of a first date—Kyle and Dani’s first date.

  “As much as I’d like to take credit, I can’t. This was all Kyle.” Jack smiled down at me, but the smile didn’t reach all the way to his eyes. He rubbed a thumb across my cheek. “I’m worried about you.”

  I faced forward again. His words squeezed my heart. I know. I mindspoke because I didn’t trust my voice.

  You’ve shut me out.

  I’m trying to protect you. The words were out before I could stop them. I felt Jack’s body go rigid. I knew immediately I had said the wrong thing.

  Jack took in a slow, steady breath. Kyle, why don’t you take Danielle for a walk?

  Kyle, who had been whispering and laughing with Dani far enough away from us that we couldn’t hear their conversation, looked over at us. His face grew serious. “You guys are zero fun.” He stood, then reached both hands and pulled Dani to her feet. “I’m taking Dani for a walk.”

  They walked toward us. “I think you’re fun,” Dani shrugged with a giggle.

  “You…” Kyle said, pointing at Jack. “You can clean this up.”

  When they were gone, Jack nudged me gently away and stood. I immediately felt the heat leave my backside.

  He paced in front of me, running his fingers through his hair. “I didn’t bring you back to Wellington so that you would hide everything from me.” I stared at the ground, refusing to look at him. I don’t want your protection. His booming voice inside my head made me flinch. Look at me!

  I slowly tilted my head toward him. The hurt look on his face sent a stabbing pulse straight through my heart. I swallowed hard against the lump in my throat as he stared at me in silence. Finally, I said, “Why exactly did you bring me back here?”

  “I brought you back here because we need answers, and right now, Wellington can provide some security while we search for those answers.”

  I raised a brow. “You think the truth is here?”

  “I do. Come on. I have something to show you.” Jack pulled me up by my hands. Keeping hold of one, he pulled me after him. “Let’s walk.”

  “What about this stuff?” I motioned toward our picnic mess.

  His lips quirked on one side. “I already told Kyle he needed to come back and deal with it.”

  “I bet he was furious.”

  “He can’t mindspeak to me, only hear.” There was a twinkle in Jack’s eye that confused me a little. We headed back toward the main part of campus.

  “So, you can speak directly to Kyle’s mind and choose whether I hear it?”

  “Yes.”

  “That must take a lot of control.”

  “I’m learning.”

  “But Kyle can’t speak back to you. Interesting.”

  Jack rubbed his thumb in circles on the back of my hand as we made our way around the stables. “When you’re ready, Seth would like to start working with you.”

  I bet he would. I stopped and pulled my hand away from him. The smells of hay and manure from the stable wafted toward us.

  He took a step closer, refusing to let a gap grow between us. “I also brought you b
ack to Wellington because Jonas was inside your head. He was able to control your actions. I figured that since I had to be in close proximity to mindspeak with you, Jonas needed the same.”

  Jonas didn’t have the same limitations, but for some reason I was unable to tell Jack. Jonas had somehow blocked my ability to reveal his plans. “Do you still wonder at times if we’d be better off running?”

  “Of course. When I think you might be harmed, I fantasize about helping you escape. However, while I respect the fact that you’re struggling with how we came into this world—”

  “You aren’t. Struggling, that is. You think we could use these abilities for good. That it’s somehow okay. Okay that so many embryos died during the process of creating each of us.”

  “I don’t agree with the lost lives or how our parents hid the truth from us all these years. We were lied to. But…” Jack rubbed the back of his neck. “If I thought I could use these healing abilities to save a life? I would do it. What they did was wrong, and I worry about the threats against us now. Last week, I thought the best thing for us… for you… was to run.”

  “But now?”

  “I want you safe. I also want a life with you that doesn’t require us changing our names and location every thirty days. Is that how you really want to go through life? Not knowing? Hiding? Always running? What if we run, and someone is still getting inside your head? What then? Whether you embrace these unnatural abilities or not, I’m no longer certain we can hide from that.”

  I looked away. A breeze blew hair in my face, and he pushed it away.

  “You are so beautiful. You have the heart and the mind to do something amazing in this world.”

  My eyes found his. Moisture pooled, making my vision blurry. “What if I don’t want to be amazing? What if I want to be… I don’t know… not amazing? Average, even. What if I want to be like everybody else? Finish high school. Go to college. Get married. Have two point four kids. Own a golden retriever and a betta fish.”